he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
