the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
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