A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
