Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
May the power of my ass compel you!!
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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