we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Randomize
