We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize
