i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Randomize
