I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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