So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Randomize
