It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
