Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Randomize
