Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
