What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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