i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
