Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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