just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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