it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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