you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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