All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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