He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
