You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
