so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
she looked like the before picture.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
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