It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
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