nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
he was CRYING into my vagina
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
