its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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