On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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