with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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