oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
