Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
