i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
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