Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
