Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
he puts the penis in happiness.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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