just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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