We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Randomize