At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
