I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
