i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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