We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Randomize
