Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Randomize
