D3 body, D1 cock
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
