they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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