Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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