I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
