So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Randomize
