walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize