if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
