i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
