Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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