We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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