Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
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