i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
